Do we want what we've got?

Ginger Johnson with son during chemo. 

Lately there has been a flood of phone calls and emails that share this common theme: When will I feel like myself again?


Anyone else feel this way? 

I remember it all very well. The excitement of the last treatment - the feeling of relief that it's over - the celebrations of life and happiness. And then comes the frustration. 

Mine came as I climbed the stairs in my home after treatment had been over for about a month. I was still huffing and puffing all the way to the top. Seriously? Those 14 stairs didn't look like Mount Everest so why the lack of air?  

It's hard to be patient with recovery time. Especially when we live in an age of instant gratification and oftentimes expect things to happen now - right when we tell them to. But like I often tell my kids, 'You don't always get what you want.'  Sometimes 'It's not having what you want, It's wanting what you've got.' (Thanks Sheryl Crow for those profound words) We’re alive, right?? Isn’t that what we wanted?  Now it's about dealing with what we've got and being patient as we recover.

Here are some simple suggestions to a happier recovery.

1. Just Breathe.

Nope, I'm not talking about Anna Nalick's song, although I do like her music. I mean, stop what you are doing and breathe. Take a minute and think about your breathing patterns. Are they shallow and short or are you filling your lungs to capacity?  Deep breathing increases the amount of oxygen in your blood stream and in a nut shell, calms you down. We've had enough stress haven't we? Let's breathe and relax for a minute. Trust me. You'll feel better.  

2. Accept.

Because recovery isn't instantaneous it is best to accept your current physical and mental state and realize that time will play a big part in the healing process. Your body has been through a lot. It will need some R&R to regain 'normal' function.  Be patient with yourself and remember that patience doesn't mean that we sit back and do nothing. Oftentimes patience requires action accompanied with a willingness to not be discouraged. And I think that's the key - not allowing ourselves to be discouraged. So for me, instead of focusing on the fact that I was out of breath, I chose to focus on the fact that I was alive and able to breath at all! 

3. Decide.

Now that you’ve accepted your current state, make a goal of how you want to be and what you want to feel like, and then take small steps each day to reach that goal.  My goal was to reach the top of the stairs without being out of breath. I took it one step at a time, one day at a time, until the glorious day when I made it to the ‘summit’ and realized I wasn’t gasping for air. I had the strongest urge to post a flag at the top of the stairs to commemorate my accomplishment. But a huge smile and the realization that I was finally getting back to ‘normal’ was enough.

4. Discuss.

Everyone will experience recovery differently according to age, body type and cancer type. It is important to keep your doctor informed of how you’re doing – especially if you are experiencing pain or long periods of sadness. Joining a support group can be very helpful too. It’s always nice to speak with others who truly understand what you’re going through. 

5. Laugh

Laughter can be very therapeutic throughout the cancer experience.  Laughter lowers blood pressure, reduces stress hormones and triggers the release of endorphins, the body's natural painkillers, and produces a general sense of well-being.  I don't think that cancer itself is funny - It's not. But I couldn't help but laugh when I found out that my dad's chemotherapy was called 5 FU. You know it's bad when your chemo is swearing at you. LOL.

What tips do you have for people who are struggling with recovery? What tips can be added to this list?